The rehearsal dinner serves multiple functions. Often, it serves as a pre-wedding party for those guests who have traveled to the even from out of town. A laid-back atmosphere gives friends and relatives on both sides a chance to meet one another or renew acquaintances. And the bride- and groom-to-be can chat with loved ones without the pressure to circulate from table to table.
The groom's parents usually host the dinner, but this is no longer a strict rule. Sometimes the bride and groom will host the dinner, or it might be hosted together by several people. Rehearsal dinners don't have to be fancy, even if the wedding is going to be quite formal. Beer and pizza served at the MOB and FOB's house will suffice, though most people do go above and beyond bar food.
If you're planning your own rehearsal dinner, here are some basic guidelines that will help you ensure it is enjoyable and memorable:
- Many hosts have lots of fun with the rehearsal dinner by incorporating a particular theme, such as a Mexican Fiesta, a Western Barbecue, a Hawaiian Luau. Think about a nautical theme and chartering a boat and having a dinner buffet on board! You can plan a clam bake at a restaurant or on a beach. You can even barbecue in the backyard!
- Some restaurants have private rooms that are great for a larger rehearsal dinner. If you do rent a private room, ask the restaurant to set up a table of hors d'oeuvres. Make the first hour of the rehearsal dinner a cocktail hour, giving guests who live at a slower pace plenty of time to get to the venue and get settled in.
- The rehearsal dinner invitation tells people exactly where and when the rehearsal will be held (sometimes it's not held at the church or ceremony location) and where and when the dinner will take place. You should include directions to the restaurant even if you think your guests are familiar with the area.
- You should invite all those who will take part in the wedding ceremony to the rehearsal dinner. Spouses or dates of all adult attendants should also be invited. Parents and grandparents of the bride and groom are always on the guest list. It's up to you whether you will invite out of town guests or best friends.
- You should make sure that everyone is introduced to each other, either through formal introductions ("going around the table") or informally ("mixing and mingling"). Here's a nice idea: Once everyone is seated, the bride- or groom-to-be introduces everyone and says something personal about each one.
Other than these rules, anything goes! The food and the venue are up to you or the host planning the event, and can be as simple or as fancy as you like. There's also no one dress code -- what you and others will wear to the rehearsal dinner will depend on the event itself, though many brides-to-be pick a special outfit to wear...remember, people WILL be taking photos!
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